Wanting to be SAFE within your relationships – a free website for men

Many years ago when I wrote a self-help book for men titled ‘Feeling angry, playing fair’. It was written for men struggling with patterns of abusive practice in their relationships, a not uncommon pattern of behaviour that has detrimental impact of everyone; their partner, children and the man himself. Few men in my experience when they really face their own truth around their behaviour want to be known as a man who is abusive towards his partner and family.

All of us know that changing behaviour is not always straightforward. If it was, we would all be able to act with integrity in our relationships 24/7. Interrupting patterns of abusive practices is such an important issue for us, that I have urged our team to continually explore ways to reach men and provide them with a way forward, a way free from abusive practices. Over the past few months we have built a free website resource for men to support their goal of being safe around others. For practitioners it will be a valuable resource. It will support work with men who are struggling with family safety.

 How can this site enhance the safety of men within families?

• It will help men to become more mindful of how their actions affect others
• Provide on-going safety tips for those men wanting to change abusive habits and behaviours
• Invite men to take real actions and steps towards becoming safer within their relationships
• Encourage men to take ownership and be accountable for abusive behaviours
• Affirm men’s abilities to change by sharing the stories of others men who have made changes

What the site covers:

• An easy to navigate home page which directs men to one of several safety orientated exercises, activities or information pieces
• Safety tips (in written or audio format) which cover a range of topics from assessing and managing abusive practices to understanding the victims perspective
• Various questionnaires, checklists and reflection questions that invite men to be mindful of safety within their relationships
• A downloads section with easy to access, printable safety resources men can use to become safer within their families
• Innovative ‘100 Days of Safety’ email follow up system designed to keep safety front of mind and in the process support men change habits around abusive practices

Written for an international audience it is packed with features

• Caters for low literacy levels with voice over audio for all written material
• Innovative ‘100 days of Safety’ follow up system supports on-going learning and reinforces the concept that safety is not a ‘one-time thing’
• Wide range of fantastic downloadable, printable SAFETY resources
• Huge range of ‘Safety tips’ which promote respect, trust and equality within relationships
• Recurring activities, exercises and reflection questions invite men to actively think about and change the way they interact with others
• Various quizzes, questionnaires and checklists allow men to engage in the material while assessing their own levels of safety
• Includes hours of family violence themed media
• Fully mobile (including tablets and other devices) responsive

We have also developed an overview of the site with information along with a printable prompt card to distribute to men so they can access the site.

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